Out of the Mold: Writing My Way Through Worship Culture

I love worship. It’s a time to rest, surrender, and sit with the Lord. There are moments when I love lifting my hands high in praise, singing aloud with everything in me. Other times, I find joy in dancing, jumping, and letting my praise pour out with energy and excitement. But more often than not, I worship quietly, journal in hand, as the music swells around me. While others are singing and clapping, I write my worship. I write my praise. I write my prayers. Writing is how I connect with God—it’s how I commune with Him.

For a long time, though, I felt out of place writing during worship, especially in church. The atmosphere was filled with raised hands, voices lifted in song, and people fully engaged in what I thought worship was “supposed” to look like. I felt like everyone around me had found their rhythm with God—through singing, clapping, or silently praying.

But there I was, with a journal and pen in hand, unsure if I belonged in that moment. I would glance around, wondering if others were judging me for not fully participating in the music or for not appearing as “engaged.” I questioned myself constantly: Was I worshipping the wrong way? Was I too distracted? Was I missing out on what God wanted me to experience?

What I didn’t realize was that God wasn’t waiting for me to blend into the worship culture around me. He had already given me a unique way to worship Him—through writing. Still, it was hard to fully embrace that when church often feels like a space with unspoken rules about what worship should look like.

Breaking Free from Expectations: One Sunday during worship, I tried to push through without my journal, determined to blend in. I sang the songs, raised my hands, and participated outwardly, but I felt disconnected. My thoughts were scattered, and my heart was distracted. I wasn’t connecting with God in the way I longed for.

Finally, I gave in and pulled out my journal. I began to write the thoughts God was placing on my heart, and for the first time that day, I felt like I was truly worshipping. Later, when I shared my experience with a trusted friend, I admitted my guilt and self-doubt about writing during church. Her words were simple but profound: “That is worship. It’s how you commune with God.”

From that moment, my perspective shifted. Worship wasn’t about following a formula or conforming to what everyone else was doing. It was about communing with God in the way He created me to. Writing was my expression of worship—just as valid as singing or praying aloud.

Now, when I’m in church, I feel free to bring my journal. I’m no longer worried about how it looks to others. Whether it’s jotting down a thought God places on my heart during the sermon or writing a prayer during a song, I know I’m connecting with Him in a way that’s authentic to who He made me to be.

I think about how many people might feel out of place in church, trying to worship in ways that don’t align with how God wired them. Maybe you’re someone who connects with God through creating, painting, or simply sitting in stillness. Maybe you’ve felt guilty for not worshipping the “right” way in church.

The truth is, God doesn’t box us into one way of worshipping. The church is a beautiful body of believers, and each of us brings something unique to the table. So, whether you sing with abandon, write in silence, or worship through acts of service, remember this: God delights in your worship when it comes from your heart.

Let’s move away from rigid expectations and embrace the diversity of how God created us to connect with Him. As a church, we have the opportunity to celebrate different forms of worship and encourage one another to commune with God in the ways He designed us to. For me, that’s writing. For you, it may be something else entirely. And that’s the beauty of the church—it reflects the creativity of its Creator.